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{"id":277,"date":"2014-02-04T14:50:31","date_gmt":"2014-02-04T12:50:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/martkoik.wordpress.com\/?p=277"},"modified":"2018-07-05T00:42:10","modified_gmt":"2018-07-04T21:42:10","slug":"kuidas-me-kasvatame-polvkonna-ennast-tais-topraid","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.martkoik.eu\/kuidas-me-kasvatame-polvkonna-ennast-tais-topraid\/","title":{"rendered":"Kuidas me kasvatame p\u00f5lvkonna ennast t\u00e4is t\u00f5praid"},"content":{"rendered":"

Enne kui ma alustan sellega, et ma peksan m\u00e4hkmenuusutajatele reaalsusega piki vahtimist, siis pean oluliseks jagada teile, kuidas mina \u00fcles kasvasin. Ei mingit Ameerikalikku “Mu isa oli T\u00fcri lillelaadal hobune ja ema oli Kaika-Laine lehma lellepoeg”, vaid selline lihtne lugu: Ma ei k\u00e4inud lasteaias, sest ema oli kodune ja sain oma maakodus esimesed 7 eluaastat vabalt mulda sisse s\u00fc\u00fca ja \u00f5nnelik olla. Mind on “kehaliselt” karistatud \u00fche korra. Olin oma toas p\u00f5him\u00f5tteliselt aatompommi l\u00f5hanud ja isa andis rihmaga mulle piki s\u00e4\u00e4rt. K\u00f5ik. Ei mingit “jalast kinni ja peksis vastu maad” lugu.<\/p>\n

N\u00fc\u00fcd siis asja kallale.<\/p>\n

P\u00f5him\u00f5tteliselt on meil selline seis, et N\u00f5ukogude kasvatus tegi meie vanematest(v\u00f5i vana-vanematest) sellised asjalikud masinad, millel on head ja vead. Hea on see, et m\u00f5ni mees on kokk-kondiiter-keevitaja. Halb on see, et vanemad inimesed kipuvad arvama, et kui sa n\u00e4itlejaks \u00f5pid, siis saab sinust n\u00e4itleja ja kindlasti l\u00e4hed teatrisse t\u00f6\u00f6le. (See on lihtsalt n\u00e4ide. Ei ole vaja midagi v\u00e4lja lugeda) Ehk siis vanematel inimestel eksisteerib selline “Punktist A punkti B” m\u00f5tteviis.<\/p>\n

N\u00fc\u00fcd on nii, et vahepealne p\u00f5lvkond on kasvatatud leebemas keskonnas. Minnakse punktist A punkti F, k\u00e4ides l\u00e4bi B, C, D ja E. Ja n\u00fc\u00fcd on asi veidike hapu, sest nemad kasvatavad oma lapsi veel leebemalt ja v\u00f5etakse \u00e4ra \u00f5igus neid karistada.\u00a0Nimelt v\u00f5etakse vastu seadus mis teeb sellise nipernaadi:<\/p>\n

“keelatud on igasugune lastevastane kehaline ja vaimne v\u00e4givald, sealhulgas alav\u00e4\u00e4ristamine, hirmutamine v\u00f5i ihuline karistamine.”<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Ma ei \u00fcrita n\u00fc\u00fcd seda \u00f6elda, et kui laps su piimaklaasi meelega peot\u00e4ie liiva viskab, peaksid sa talle klaasi p\u00e4he sodiks l\u00f6\u00f6ma ja ta keldrisse kinni panema ning teda seal kolm p\u00e4eva alandamas k\u00e4ima. Ei. Ma tahan \u00f6elda seda, et see seadus on nii ekstreemne, et lapsed v\u00f5ivad varsti teha mida iganes nad soovivad.<\/p>\n

Uus seadus ei kehti ainult neile, kes buduaari foorumis k\u00e4ivad ja k\u00fcsivad, kas Cethyly-Ch\u00e4thyly on ilus nimi. Ei. See t\u00e4hendab ka \u00f5petajaid. Nende p\u00e4rast olen ma v\u00e4ga mures, sest juba praegu piisab sellest, et mees\u00f5petaja m\u00fcksab kogemata \u00f5pilast, \u00f5pilane \u00fctleb, et tegu oli seksuaalse ahistamisega ja \u00f5petaja karj\u00e4\u00e4r on l\u00e4bi. (Reaalne juhtum Eesti Vabariigis). N\u00fc\u00fcd t\u00e4hendab see seda, et kui \u00f5petaja \u00fctleb lause “Kes kontrollt\u00f6\u00f6 ajal juttu r\u00e4\u00e4gib, saab kahe,” on tegu hirmutamisega, mis on seadusevastane. Ja kui keegi saabki halva hinde, on tegelikult v\u00f5imalik seda t\u00f5lgendada kui alav\u00e4\u00e4ristamist. L\u00e4heb siis toreda nimega Kudily-Kh\u00e4dily kaebama, et \u00f5petaja hirmutas ja seej\u00e4rel alav\u00e4\u00e4ristas. Putsis. Otsi omale uut t\u00f6\u00f6d, k\u00f5rgelt haritud pedagoog.<\/p>\n

Kodus on asi \u00f5nneks suletud uste taga. Ma arvan, et kui laps t\u00f5esti aru ei saa, siis tutistamine on v\u00e4ga okei lahendus. Aga tuleb v\u00e4lja, et see on f\u00fc\u00fcsiline v\u00e4givald, mis omakorda on<\/p>\n

“n\u00e4htus, mis \u00f5petab lapsele, et v\u00e4givald on heakskiidetud ja \u00f5ige\u00a0strateegia konfliktide lahendamiseks v\u00f5i selleks, et m\u00f5jutada teiste\u00a0inimeste k\u00e4itumist”\u00a0<\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Kas see peaks olema tulevikku vaatav visioon? Et kogu see tsiviilide surnuks tulistamine Afganistaanis on siiski taunitav ja ei ole lahendus? \u00a0Minu arust on siiski \u00fcks juhtivaid m\u00f5tteid maailmas just see, et kui nad seal liivasel maal \u00fckteisele natuke peksa teevad, saadame RELVASTATUD v\u00e4ed sinna RAHU VALVAMA. Ehk siis v\u00f5\u00f5rast maad terroriseerima. Ja kui sa endiselt, \u00fcritad mulle selgeks teha, et see on \u00fcllas ettev\u00f5tmine, siis mine lihtsalt munni. Ole loll edasi.<\/p>\n

Kuidas siis last kasvatada tuleb? Ei tohi \u00f6elda sellist lauset: “Kui sa korralikult ei k\u00e4itu, siis filmi vaadata ei tohi!” See on hirmutamine. “Kui sa korralikult k\u00e4itud, siis v\u00f5id filmi vaadata” See on siis korrektne viis, kuidas last kasvatada. Paraku, kui n\u00fc\u00fcd s\u00fcveneda, siis annab see lapsele valikuv\u00f5imaluse. “Kui k\u00e4itun, siis n\u00e4en filmi…aga ma situn ikkagi meelega siia salatikaussi” Mida sa siis teha tohid? Me ei hirmuta, ei karista ei alanda… Sina kui lapsevanem \u00fctled lihtsalt: “Oi, no nii k\u00fcll teha ei tohiks. See pole viisakas!” Tore, mis?<\/p>\n

L\u00f5ppkokkuv\u00f5ttes juhtub see, et kasvab \u00fcles p\u00f5lvkond lapsi, kes pole kunagi \u00fchegi asja eest karistada saanud. Arvavad endast meeletult palju ning \u00f5iglust j\u00e4\u00e4b igas olukorras \u00fcle, sest nad v\u00f5ivad teha mida nad tahavad. “No aga siin tulevad ju teised seadused m\u00e4ngu! Kui seadust rikuvad l\u00e4hevad kinni!” \u00fctleb alla keskmise m\u00f5tlemisv\u00f5imega netikommentaator. Sul on \u00f5igus, aga nad saavad siis esimese t\u00e4htsa \u00f5petusena kriminaalkaristuse. See, et nende vanem neid lapsena varastamise eest tutistab, annab neile tingitud refleksi, et keelatud asju tehes v\u00f5ib midagi halba juhtuda.<\/p>\n

Juba praegu koolitatakse Tartu \u00dclikooli magistri\u00f5ppes v\u00e4lja katsetuskorras gruppi saamatuid \u00f5petajaid, sest haridusteaduskond katsetab uut debiilset \u00f5ppeprogrammi, kus \u00f5petatakse v\u00f5imalikult \u00fcmmargust tagasisidet andma ning kuidas laps ennast igas olukorras \u00fclimugavalt tunneks. See, et mul oli hirm sitta hinnet saada MOTIVEERIS mind \u00f5ppima.\u00a0Aga ei. Mingil p\u00f5hjusel l\u00e4heme me selles suunas, et varsti ei tohi last r\u00e4\u00e4kima \u00f5petada, sest keel on viis inimest m\u00f5jutada.<\/p>\n

Loodan s\u00fcdamest, et enne kui sadade \u00f5petajate t\u00f6\u00f6kohad ohtu seatakse ja lapsevanemaid ahistama hakatakse, suudab keegi selle lollaka seaduse \u00e4ra kaotada.<\/p>\n

Annan v\u00f5imaluse enda seisukohta kommentaarides avalikustada, mainides et siin blogis on “nagu k\u00fcla koerale, nii koer k\u00fclale” poliitika.<\/em><\/p>\n

Kasutatud allikad:
\nhttp:\/\/www.ohtuleht.ee\/560972\/uus-seadus-keelab-laste-karistamise
\nhttp:\/\/www.coe.int\/t\/dg3\/children\/pdf\/EstonianQuestionAnswers.pdf<\/address>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Enne kui ma alustan sellega, et ma peksan m\u00e4hkmenuusutajatele reaalsusega piki vahtimist, siis pean oluliseks jagada teile, kuidas mina \u00fcles kasvasin. Ei mingit Ameerikalikku “Mu isa oli T\u00fcri lillelaadal hobune ja ema oli Kaika-Laine lehma […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":1323,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[27],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nKuidas me kasvatame p\u00f5lvkonna ennast t\u00e4is t\u00f5praid - M\u00e4rdi Kelder<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.martkoik.eu\/kuidas-me-kasvatame-polvkonna-ennast-tais-topraid\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"et_EE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Kuidas me kasvatame p\u00f5lvkonna ennast t\u00e4is t\u00f5praid - M\u00e4rdi Kelder\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Enne kui ma alustan sellega, et ma peksan m\u00e4hkmenuusutajatele reaalsusega piki vahtimist, siis pean oluliseks jagada teile, kuidas mina \u00fcles kasvasin. 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